IMAGINARY FRIENDS

19 May

DOES YOUR CHILD WITH AUTISM HAVE AN IMAGINARY FRIEND?

by Lirio S Covey, Ph.D.

Imaginary friends (also known as pretend friends or invisible friends) are a psychological and social phenomenon where a friendship or other interpersonal relationship takes place in the imagination rather than external physical reality”. (1)

Many parents notice that their child may talk of an imaginary friend, with whom the child may engage in vivid interactions consisting of play and sharing of stories.

Imaginary friends are not signs of trouble. In fact, they are often practice opportunities for learning how to engage in a range of social activities, or seek as a source of comfort when feeling fearful or sad, even if “pretend”, yet realizing the "friend" is not real.

Having an imaginary friend, however, is thought not to be accessible to children with autism, which would be consistent with a deficit in social skills and emotional understanding, considered a core characteristic of autism.

A recent research study examined whether this assumption is always the case. (2) Parents of 111 children between 24 and 96 months old were asked if they had observed their children engage in imaginary friendships and play. The parents’ responses were compared to parents of children without autism who were seen in a separate study and asked the same question.

The research showed that, although fewer than among children without autism, a subset of children with autism were able to spontaneously create imaginary friends. Further having imaginary friends was observed to begin later than in the children without autism. The lack of comparability in parent samples and methods that limit the exploratory study render the observed results requiring of further study.

Comment: Having imaginary friends would seem consistent with the remarkable creativity in art and music demonstrated by some children with autism. The study finding, if confirmed, suggests the possibility that helping children with autism engage in imaginary friends may improve social skills and alleviate social difficulties characteristic of the autism condition.

References:

(1) Taylor, M. Imaginary Companions and the Children Who Create Them. New York: Oxford University Press, 1999.

(2) Davis, PE, Simon H, Meins E, Robins, DL. Imaginary Companions in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder. J Autism and Developmental Disorders, on line March 21, 2018.

One Response to “IMAGINARY FRIENDS”

  1. neurodivergentnarwhal's avatar
    neurodivergentnarwhal 28 July 2023 at 02:33 #

    I had an imaginary friend as a preteen and teenager I still talk to sometimes as an adult. (I was recently diagnosed low support needs autism at age 35) He wasn’t entirely of my own creation, he was the Vampire Lestat, born of my special interest in vampires, particularly Anne Rice’s Vampire chronicle series. Lestat could communicate telepathically so he became my friend and I talked to his imaginary persona often and even pretended a romantic relationship with him in my head. I went to Lestat when real life and real people were overwhelming to have a place to regroup in my own head and he comforted me. I stopped talking to Lestat so much once I was married because it felt in a way like cheating on my husband because even though I logically knew Lestat was imaginary he was very real to me emotionally.

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